Movies You must See - U to Z

Movie Reviews - U

The Untold Story – This infamous example of Hong Kong’s notoriously racy Category 3 cinema remains strong stuff and is actually based on a real life incident. The great Anthony Wong stars as Wong Chi Hang, a gruff, bespectacled man who relocates himself after committing a grizzly murder in Hong Kong in 1978. In 1986 a woman and her kids discover some washed up body parts on a Macau beach. It transpires that Wong is the owner of the local Eight Immortals restaurant; the original owner having mysteriously disappeared without a trace. When members of staff also begin disappearing, the police deem Wong the prime suspect in the missing person cases and the recent murders involving the severed body parts. Wong kills one employee who shoots his mouth off about him cheating at cards, ferociously bludgeoning the man to death in a gruesome, blackly comic scene. Then comes the shocker; he cuts up the body and turns the minced body parts into various meat buns which he sells to his unwitting customers under the guise of pork! Wong’s next victim is a female employee who wants to leave his employment due to her suspicions and fear of this frightening man. In a grim, nastily protracted scene, Wong first rapes her and then kills her using a highly unorthodox, truly grim method I won’t reveal here. More human buns are naturally on the menu! Wong is ultimately taken into custody by the police, who beat and torture him due to lack of evidence in the hope that he’ll confess to his horrendous crimes. A flashback late in the film reveals what Wong did with the original owner of the restaurant; after the boss riled him by refusing to pay the money owed to him, Wong brutally butchered him and his entire family, including his wife and many children, all unflinchingly depicted by director Yau in a gruelling, taboo-breaking, take no prisoners sequence. The first half’s focus on Wong’s spree of bloody murders is in marked contrast to his lengthy incarceration in the second half of the film, whereby his extreme mistreatment at the hands of the authorities almost makes us feel sorry for this vile, inhuman mass-murderer; some feat! A gory, extremely well made, grittily effective Crime Thriller with a bizarre smattering of standard Hong Kong Comedy throughout, The Untold Story boasts a horribly convincing lead performance from Anthony Wong and as a Horror/ Exploitation film it lives down to its infamous reputation with considerable style.

Trivia: Also known as Bunman – The Untold Story. The film was cut to obtain a Category 3 rating [the highest film category] in Hong Kong. The recent US DVD contains the uncut version of the film.

Directed by Herman Yau, Danny Lee – 1993 – 96 minutes – Starring Anthony Wong [Hard Boiled, Ebola Syndrome], Emily Kwan [Dr. Lamb], Danny Lee [The Killer, Dr. Lamb], Tony Leung Sui Hung [Enter the Fat Dragon], Julie Lee [Dr. Lamb, Chinese Torture Chamber], Parkman Wong [Dr. Lamb, City on Fire], Shing Fui-Ong [A Better Tomorrow 2, God of Gamblers].

If you like this you may also like: Ebola Syndrome [1996] – More Category 3 nastiness from director Herman Yau. Anthony Wong takes the lead again for this deliriously bad taste classic, a film so gleefully wrong it is extremely entertaining. More burgers made from humans, rape and murder but with a new twist; Wong’s vile protagonist unwittingly becomes a carrier of the fatal Ebola virus after raping a fever stricken African lady. He himself is unaffected but those around him who make contact with any of his blood, sweat, sneezes, etc. start dropping off like flies. A sleazy, enormously fun Exploitation Thriller which is not to be missed.

Reason U must C – It remains one of the high points of Hong Kong’s once lucrative Category 3 extreme cinema outings, a deliberately outrageous approach to filmmaking which has sadly died out.

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Movie Reviews - V

Vampire Circus – This highly unusual Hammer Horror showcases the fantastically bizarre premise of a travelling circus run by shape-shifting vampires. The films’ greatness is established immediately with a cracking extended pre-credits scene. Children are disappearing from a European Village, their bodies eventually turning up drained of blood. It transpires that they are being murdered by the handsome Count Mitterhaus [an excellent Robert Tayman], a vampire who is sexually pleasuring one of the villager’s wives [cue a sensuously erotic montage of lovemaking] in exchange for her luring young children for him to feast on. The villagers get wise to this and find the Count’s lair. A bloody fight ensues as the Count cuts the throats and bites the necks of the rabble of enraged villagers; ultimately he is defeated. His accomplice is then flogged as punishment for her sinful ways. After this exciting, sexy, action-packed opening, the film cuts to the 19th century, where a plague has stricken the populace. A travelling circus manages to get past the quarantined zone and into the village seen in the films’ opening. The villagers are delighted by the circus performers, among whom are a pair of semi-naked, whip wielding S&M dancers [one for the kids?] and a man who can transform into a panther. However, the children begin going missing once more, since the circus is really a front for vengeful vampires who intend to revive Count Mitterhaus so he can feast on the descendants of those who killed him. A stylish, highly original take on vampire mythology, Vampire Circus has a peculiarly dreamlike quality which distinguishes it from standard Horror fare. It is also [despite censor intervention] considerably gory for the time, culminating in a rip-roaring blood bath which delivers the goods and then some, especially the wonderfully over the top demise of the Count. Indeed, Count Mitterhaus is such a charismatic, memorable foe it’s a shame he didn’t return for a sequel.

Trivia: The film was Robert Young’s directorial debut. Dave Prowse [Star Wars’ Darth Vader] appears as the ‘Strongman’. As with the majority of Hammer’s Horror productions, Vampire Circus suffered various censor cuts in order to obtain an ‘X’ certificate in the UK. This cut footage appears to be lost unfortunately. For the films US theatrical release, the film suffered very extensive cuts in order to receive a ‘PG’ certificate; all gore and sex was removed.

Directed by Robert Young – 1972 – 87 minutes – Starring Adrienne Corri [Doctor Who], Anthony Higgins [Young Sherlock Holmes], Robert Tayman [Up Pompeii], John Moulder-Brown, Thorley Walters [Frankenstein Must Be Destroyed], Elizabeth Seal, Richard Owens, Domini Blythe, Laurence Payne, Lynne Frederick, Christina Paul, Robin Sachs [Buffy the Vampire Slayer] and Milovan & Serena as the dancers.

If you like this you may also like: The Vampire Lovers [1970] – Hammer’s Erotic Horror classic - their first in a series of vampire lesbian films - focuses on Marcilla/ Carmilla Karnstein, superbly played by a luscious Ingrid Pitt. Taste the Blood of Dracula [1970] – An underrated, thematically resonant sequel centring on the innate hypocrisy of Victorian gentlemen, epitomised by a group of men who are outwardly respectable but secretly anything but. Slightly marred by Christopher Lee’s Dracula being clumsily shoehorned into the narrative but still recommended.

Reason U must C – It features one of the coolest, meanest bloodsuckers to grace the silver screen. It is one of Hammer’s finest vampire movies.

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Vice Squad – In this hard-hitting cult classic, Season Hubley stars as Princess, an L.A. Business woman who has also turned to prostitution to support herself and her young child. After being caught attempting to ply her wares, Princess is strong armed by a detective into going under cover to set up a sadistic pimp named ‘Ramrod’; when she is shown the horrific remnants of her friend Ginger, a prostitute Ramrod has brutalised to death, she agrees to assist the police. Ramrod is successfully taken into custody but manages to escape from his police captors and he is Hell-bent on getting revenge on Princess for setting him up. At this point the film becomes a race against time as the cops try to get to Princess before the crazed pimp tracks her down. Vice Squad is a gritty, down and dirty thriller with terrific performances from Season Hubley and a ferocious, horrifyingly convincing Wings Hauser as Ramrod.

Trivia: The films’ opening credits song ‘Neon Slime’ was performed by star Wings Hauser. Vice Squad caused a huge ruckus at the BBFC [British Board of Film Classification] upon its submission in 1981 and they demanded over 6 minutes of cuts in order to grant the film its’ X rating. The film was released on video in 1987 in an American TV version which was missing even more footage including every instance of bad language. The film would have no censorship problems today but unfortunately no distributors have seen fit to re-submit it. It is readily available on US DVD and can be purchased through Amazon.

Directed by Gary Sherman – 1981 – 97 minutes – Starring Season Hubley, Gary Swanson, Wings Hauser, Pepe Serna, Beverly Todd and Nina Blackwood.

If you like this you may also like: Death Line [1972] - Gary Sherman’s excellent directorial debut, a horror drama about a group of people who were trapped underground by a cave-in many years ago, only to have developed a taste for human flesh, their situation necessitating the eating of their dead companions in order to survive. With their own number depleting, they begin attacking unsuspecting victims in the London Underground. Starring Donald Pleasance. Dead & Buried [1981] – Another cult classic from Director Gary Sherman, Dead & Buried is a wonderfully nasty horror thriller with a shocking twist ending. Coffy [1973] – A gritty blaxploitation revenge thriller starring Pam Grier which revels in its’ unrelenting focus on the pimps and lowlife scumbags of the movie world.

Reason U must C - Season Hubley and Wings Hauser are both superb in this hard hitting Thriller.  It's the cinematic equivalent of a gut-punch.

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The Video Dead - The 1980’s brought loads of cheap and nasty straight-to-video horror films, and this is one of our favourites. The gory plot involves a family moving to a new house and finding they have inherited an old television from the previous tenant - who coincidentally happened to be found dead. Unfortunately for these new residents it turns out that this TV emits zombies, who climb through the screen and go on a bloody killing spree. Finding themselves having to fight these rampaging zombies are a group of three kids, aided by a range of improvised weapons, delightfully including a chainsaw. The acting is terrible, the script dire, the plot awful…and I’m not even going to credit the climbing through the television scenes with any kind of link to The Ring, but despite all of this, it just remains a good laugh and fun to watch.

Trivia: This could have been called The Career Dead, as none of the cast or crew have progressed to anything meaningful - in fact many of the cast never acted again - not that they acted much in this! As far as we are aware this title isn't available on DVD. The links below are for video versions.

Directed by Robert Scott - 1987 - 90 mins - Starring Rocky Duvall, Roxanna Augesen, Sam David McClelland, Anthony C. Ferrante and Michael St. Michaels

If you like this you may also like: Sleepaway Camp [1983] the cheaper and nastier Friday the 13th copy. The Evil Dead [1981] the horror classic with Bruce Campbell stranded in a cottage fighting off evil spirits.

Reason U must C - The chainsaw slicing and dicing is worth the price of a ticket.

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Movie Reviews - W

Westworld - Michael Crichton must really be a busy man. As well as being a blockbusting author [Jurassic Park, The Andromeda Strain, Rising Sun etc.], he also finds time to Produce films [Twister, Sphere etc.], and this was his first stab at directing, going on to make Coma and The First Great Train Robbery among others. In Westworld, Yul Brynner stars as a robotic cowboy at a luxury western holiday resort. The idea is that stressed-out business men [such as James Brolin and Richard Benjamin] can go to the resort and live out their Wild West fantasies in order to relax. The twist is that the theme park is staffed by robots, from the blacksmiths, to the dancing girls, to the bad guys - led by a menacing Brynner dressed all in black. All goes well until the robots start to malfunction, taking on a life of their own and needless to say Brynner looks forward to dishing out some revenge, after having previously been programmed to get shot all the time. It all builds to a very exciting finale, which you can’t help think provided some inspiration for the Terminator films.

Trivia: The shots in the film from Yul Brynner's 'point of view' were the first use of computer digital images used in a movie. There are currently plans for a [very probably inferior] remake.

Directed by Michael Crichton - 1973 - 88 minutes - Starring Yul Brynner, James Brolin, Richard Benjamin, Norman Bartold and Alan Oppenheimer.

If you like this you may also like: RoboCop [1987] Part man. Part machine. All cop. The future of law enforcement. Terminator [1984] in which another unstoppable machine goes on the rampage.

Reason U must C - Yul Brynner is fantastic as the creepy avenging robot

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Wicked City – A wonderfully stylish, boldly erotic Horror Thriller from Anime maestro Yoshiaki Kawajiri. This strikingly designed and impressively animated film centres on Taki, a human ‘black guard agent’ placed in charge of protecting Giuseppi Mayart, the 200 year old Ambassador for inter-dimensional peace between the worlds. He is up against various Demons who wish to ensure the proposed treaty never takes place. To complicate matters he is paired up with the Demon world’s ‘black guard agent’ representative, the alluring, beautiful Mackie, whose human, feminine appearance belies her powerful abilities, enabling her to exist as a deceptively strong adversary. Unfortunately for Taki and Mackie, Mayart proves to be more trouble than he’s worth; the little old letch’s sex-crazed impulses constantly placing him in danger. However looks can be deceptive and Mayart is privy to integral information which he hasn’t shared with his weary protectors. As the fate of humankind hangs in the balance and a Demonic showdown imminent, can Taki and Mackie best their Demonic adversaries and ensure the unity of the two worlds? Wicked City remains a visually arresting saga, as director Kawajiri makes moody use of coloured lighting, instilling plentiful atmosphere and keeping the film moving at a solid pace, while integrating more than enough imaginative sex and violence for the discerning film fan to enjoy. The monstrous Demons are all nicely defined too, each employing their own individual means of attack. Their frequent surprise attacks are deftly handled and suspenseful; the film cannily builds up to the horrific payoff of their sudden appearances with a creepy efficiency, jolting the audience with welcome, gruesomely inventive shocks. The epic climactic showdown is also worth the wait with a surprise or two in store.

Trivia: Wicked City was dubbed into English for international release in the UK and the US in 1993. The UK and US dubs were made by different companies and offer intriguingly different vocal interpretations of the characters. Wicked City was heavily cut to obtain an ‘18’ certificate in the UK: 1 minute and 48 seconds were removed, toning down a rape scene, as well as cutting a shot of a Demon forcing it’s tongue into the heroine’s mouth in another scene and completely eliminating an implied, risqué Demonic gang-rape sequence due to concerns over alleged eroticised sexual violence. Many of these cuts would likely be waived if the film were to be resubmitted today. Wicked City was remade in Hong Kong as a live action film in 1992.

Directed by Yoskiaki Kawajiri – 1987 – 82 minutes – Animated

If you like this you may also like: Monster City/Demon City Shinjuku [1988] – Yoshiaki Kawajiri’s subsequent Horror film ditches the sex in favour of a more fantastical Demon-filled romp. Just avoid the terrible dubbed version! Ninja Scroll [1993] – Another Kawajiri cracker. This popular Anime Action film focuses on a travelling Samurai named Jubei. Cyber City Oedo 808 [1990] – A highly entertaining 3 part Sci-Fi Action series from Kawajiri.

Reason U must C – You’ll think twice about picking up strangers at your local bar after seeing what happens to central protagonist Taki in the opening scene; his beautiful new lady friend reveals herself to be a Demonic spider woman after trying to bite off his unmentionables with her teeth-equipped vagina! Paging Doctor Freud!

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Wild Orchid - If you are looking for some prime eroticism, without the seediness of having to pass through the beaded curtain in your local video shop, then the big budget, big screen, star-fuelled ‘Erotic-Thriller’ is the genre to have a look at. But forget 9½ weeks, Body of Evidence, Sliver or Colour of Night, as Wild Orchid is the standout performer in this field. Based on the classic foundations laid down by the likes of Emmanuelle or Eugenie, this story is that of an innocent young woman finding sexual awakening and learning lessons of the world in exotic surroundings. The innocent in question in Wild Orchid is former model Carre Otis whose naive lawyer is trust into a steamy Brazilian location to help with a property deal. As the heat rises over the transaction , her passions are also risen, firstly by the raunchy activities of her horny boss [Jacqueline Bisset], but also by her encounters with a mysterious and charismatic stranger Mickey Rourke. Otis makes an attractive and compelling leading lady, with the fact that she is a novice actress possibly lending some realism to the naivety and innocence of her performance. Meanwhile Rourke is on fine form as the brooding James Dean-like charmer - this is before his good looks took a beating from his ill-advised attempt to become a professional boxer. His gold earring is perhaps a tad unnecessary, but you have to remember this was made back in 1990. If you forgive the fact that the flimsy property deal of a plot was probably conceived on the back of a postage stamp, and just relax and enjoy the sexy Rio locations, the excellent samba soundtrack and the chemistry between the leads - which all confirms this as a standout favourite of the big screen eroticism genre.

Trivia: Mickey Rourke and Carre Otis were dating at the time of filming, so the sexy romps are lent an extra air of realism, but allegedly being real.

Directed by Zalman King - 1990 - 111mins - Starring Mickey Rourke [Sin City], Carre Otis, Jacqueline Bisset [Bullitt], Assumpta Serna and Bruce Greenwood [I, Robot]

If you like this you may also like: Basic Instinct [1992] Sharon Stone's sexy performance ensures that male members in the audience are literally glued to their seats. Masquerade [1988] bad boy Rob Lowe seduces innocent heiress Meg Tilley in this enjoyable steamy thriller. Zandalee [1991] bad boy Nicolas Cage keeps a horny Erika Anderson satisfied, while her burnt-out businessman husband [Judge Reinhold] is suffering from a lack of lead in his pencil.

Reason U must C - This movie sails along like an extended Duran Duran music video with sun, sea and sex followed by an enjoyable climax.

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The Wraith - Often derided for its 80’s soundtrack, naff special effects and simplistic storyline, this really is a guilty pleasure. Pretty-boy Sheen stars as a mystical avenging angel with a suped-up Dodge Turbo Interceptor seeking revenge on a car-jacking gang that bully their way around a small desert town. Randy Quaid is the town sheriff trying to figure out what is going on, while Sherilyn Fenn is the town beauty caught between bad boy Cassavetes and the mysterious Sheen. The underrated script is full of clever dialogue and quips from writer/director Mike Marvin, who loads the film with fast cars, big guns and lots of macho posturing. What more do you possibly need?

Trivia: Amazingly this is probably directors Mike Marvin's career highpoint (to date), his other movies include the truly terrible Wishman [1993] and Hamburger - The Motion Picture [1986]. Look out for everyone's favourite cult hero Clint Howard [Ron's brother], whose character Rughead explains that a Wraith is 'An evil spirit. And it ain't cool, man.'

Directed by Mike Marvin - 1986 - 92mins - Starring Charlie Sheen, Nick Cassavetes, Sherilyn Fenn, Randy Quaid and Matthew Barry.

If you like this you may also like: Evilspeak [1981] Clint Howard summons evil spirits in order to seek revenge on his school bullies. Christine [1983] the Stephen King novel adaptation about an evil car that possesses its geeky owner.

Reason U must C - Sherilyn for the lads, Charlie for the ladies.

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Movie Reviews - Z

Zero Effect - Bill Pullman is perfectly cast as the reclusive, yet brilliant very private detective Daryl Zero. Lacking communication and personal skills, he relies on his assistant [played by Ben Stiller], to act as a front man and only ventures out of his hidden apartment when forced to work on a case. The case in question this time is when millionaire Ryan O'Neal hires him to help find his blackmailers and a set of lost keys. However things are not as simple as they sound and Zero's quirky techniques seems to have met their match when he finds himself attracted to Kim Dickens paramedic and quarry. An unusual, eccentric and funny mystery movie, also featuring a particularly entertaining soundtrack for a Hollywood movie.

Trivia: This was writer and directors Jake Kasdan's first movie, he went on to make the music-biog parody Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story [2007]. In 2002 he also made a TV pilot of Zero Effect for NBC starring Alan Cumming in the title role. They decided not to proceed with a series.

Directed by Jake Kasdan - 1998 - 116 minutes - Starring Bill Pullman, Ben Stiller, Kim Dickens, Ryan O'Neal and Angela Featherstone.

If you like this you may also like: Without a Clue [1988] rather disappointing comedy with Ben Kingsley's brilliant but shy detective Dr. Watson, hiring an actor [Michael Caine] to play a character Sherlock Holmes and deflect the attention.

Reason U must C - The cool dialogue and soundtrack provide plenty of reasons to watch.

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